Wednesday, April 07, 2010

top ten ways to GO TO HELL

Perhaps you are tired of the idea of going to heaven. Sounds boring? Well, try hell instead! It’s sure to be interesting. After all, every selfish person who has ever lived will be there, and there won’t be anyone with good intentions to limit the evil done. Not only will you be able to do whatever evil you want, but so will everyone else! It will be a free-for-all of oppression and destruction and theft and hatred, without anyone to stop anyone. Everyone doing even more evil to you than you do to them. That ought to be interesting. In fact, it is mentioned as a place where crying and agony will never cease. If you want to try it out, here are some ways that people have found to be really successful in getting there:

1. Curse God
“Curse God and die.” Job 2:9
If you want to be cursed by God and gain his hatred, all you have to do is express hatred to God. Tell God just how much you despise him and how you wish he would be extinct. Disrespect him in every way you can think of. Although he would still want you to repent (because he loves you) he will send you to hell.

2. Rebel against God
“If you refuse to listen and rebel against the Lord, you will be devoured by the sword.” Isaiah 1:20
God has the right to ask everyone on earth to listen to him and obey him because they are all his creation. However, if you want to be punished by God, you can always refuse to listen to anything God says. Whatever God says, just do the opposite. Whatever God wants, thumb your nose at him and do whatever you want. This way to get to hell isn’t unique, but it’s really effective.

3. Blaspheme the Holy Spirit
Blasphemy against the Spirit shall not be forgiven. Matthew 12:31
This way to get to hell is more rare, and it has some flair to it. Blasphemy of the Spirit is to see God’s work—a miracle that does someone some great good, for instance—and claim that it is done by the power of some evil god, like Satan. No believer in God can do this one, so one has to really work at it!

4. Don’t believe in Jesus
“Unless you believe that I am, you will die in your sins." John 8:24
This way is very popular with the majority of people of the world who are not Christians. It is very acceptable to those who wish to be tolerant as well. After all, in the world today it is popular to be tolerant to everyone except to those who say that Jesus has an exclusive claim to life.

5. Believe in Jesus but don’t act like it
He who does not obey the Son will not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him." John 3:36
This is the most popular method for Christians who wish to go to hell. Christians are participating in this in droves! Whole churches are praising Jesus and ignoring his commands, and so you can join a community of Christian hell-visitors.

6. Don’t Help the People of Jesus when they are in need
“Depart from me, accursed ones, into the eternal fire which has been prepared for the devil and his angels for I was hungry, and you gave me nothing to eat.” Matthew 25:41-42
If you feel that anyone who needs food or shelter is that way because of their own laziness, this way could be for you. If you see a follower of Jesus in need, just ignore them. It’s easy and effective! To make sure it does the trick, you can add an insult like “get a job” on top of it.

7. Oppress the Needy
If you afflict the needy at all, and if he does cry out to Me, I will surely hear his cry; and My anger will be kindled, and I will kill you with the sword. Exodus 22:23-24
You could go all the way and actually take from the needy! This is the quickest way to get to hell, and popular among the wealthy and powerful. Rub elbows with the upper crust and see that the needy don’t get a fair shake!

8. Don’t repent of your habitual sin
Even if a good man changes and then does evil, every good thing one has done will not be remembered, but only the sin and treachery he committed, and for them, he will die. Ezekiel 18:23-24
God has repeatedly said that anyone who repents from their evil deeds will live. But if you keep doing what evil you’re already doing, you will die and go to hell! There’s nothing to it, just keep doing the evil you are already doing. Of course if you think you aren’t doing any evil, then just keep that up, too! Hypocrites get to hell just as easily as any other sinner.

9. Reject the one who repents of their sin
If you do not forgive, you will not be forgiven. Matthew 6:15
This is a lesser known path to hell. Whoever has ever done you wrong, just keep it in mind and refuse to have anything to do with them because of it—that will send you to hell! Getting to hell is so easy, sometimes you can get there by not even trying!

10. Train others to go to hell
You travel to make one student; and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as yourselves. Matthew 23:15
There are so many ways to do this! You could help someone lose their faith in God, teach them to rebel against God, or tempt them to sin. This is the group method of getting to hell. And, as a special bonus, the one who does this gets to see the worst parts of hell!

You see how easy it is to get to hell? Jesus himself said, “Broad is the path that leads to destruction.” Of course, the problem about visiting hell is that you can’t ever leave. It’s kinda the Hotel California of the Spirit world. That can be a bummer, especially if you are tired of it. But anyone who visits hell, has it for their home. Forever. Frankly, that really sucks.

Now, God isn’t in the business of sending people to hell, even if some teachers make it sound that way. God says, “I have no pleasure in the death of anyone who dies, therefore, repent and live.” Ezekiel 18: Everyone has the possibility of escaping hell—God gives everyone the chance to not visit it at all. If you are interested in not visiting hell, then do the following:

Believe in Jesus
Do what Jesus says
Ask for the Holy Spirit
Keep living according to what God gives you.

This isn’t necessarily easy, nor is it popular. But it’s a much better life both on earth and eternally than living in hell on earth and then suffering with real hell for eternity.

Visiting hell is popular, but Jesus’ way is really radical.

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